Monday, March 15, 2010

He's back....

Saturday was a gorgeous and sunny California day..it seemed innocent enough. The kids were outside playing, laughing, having a good time, until I heard "it" trailing on the coat tails of the wind. NO. No no no! Already?! It'd been a while since he'd come around...I should have known he'd be back soon. I should have been prepared, but I wasn't. The music was getting louder and louder, blaring out of half blown speakers...taunting me! CRAP! There wasn't enough time to round up the kids, I'd have to face him head on. Me vs Him. Mano a mano. Bring it.

I braced myself as I heard the cryptic tune coming closer, then I saw him making his way around the corner and into the court. His eyes locked with mine. I assumed the 'You're not taking my money today' stance. He turned up the volume....ahhh so he wanted to play dirty did he? Fine by me. I called out to the kids as they started to make their way to the street. "Come here guys! I have a TREAT for you!!"

That's right, a treat....and one that didn't cost $4 a pop. I wasn't about to spend a small fortune on mediocre frozen goods! You can keep your mega missiles, rainbow snow-cones, and choco tacos. Actually you can leave the choco tacos. I had a carton of Dreyers. Cookie Dough. Enough for the whole block. $3.49 on sale. BOOYA! The kids turned in my direction. One point= Clines.

Then he did the unthinkable. He CHANGED the tune, and louder this time. WHAT!? You can't change the tune!! That scalawag! Darn it. One point=Ice cream man.

Time was running out, he was making his way back around the corner. I'd have to face him one more time and victory would be mine. I did the only thing I could do. I dashed into the house, snagged the carton of ice cream, shoved spoons in my pockets, and grabbed a handful of lollipops for reinforcement. I barreled through the door, tripping over trains and cars in the process, and spotted him heading straight towards us. He slowed down and smirked, so I bellowed out at the top of my lungs...

"Come inside and get your treats kids!! We can play Lego Star War's on the Wii!!"

One by one the kids came running my way. Squealing in delight. Filing in the door, one by one. Free from the claws of the money grubbing thief! Thaaaaat's right Ice Cream Man. Treats. Lego-Star War's combo. AND Wii. Read it and weep. Suck it ya over-priced crazy-eyed swindler!! You wouldn't be bleeding a penny from us today!

Defeated, he drove away slowly...throwing daggers and hate at me with his eyes. Victory was mine. Until we meet again Ice Cream Man, until we meet again.....

49 comments:

  1. It's March and he's back????? RUN!!!

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  2. Lol....Oh the ice cream man.
    Down here they don't even have a ice truck but a creepy lookin' van with a A.C. unit in it I think.

    Wanna hear a funny/horrible story.
    When we I was younger and and still lived at home, my dad recorded the ice cream truck music and played it out the windows just to be an ass and watch the kids run around the block looking for the ice cream lady (we have a lady that does it)....so mean but kind of funny.

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  3. lol we dont get them anymore over here

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  4. This is hilarious! Hahah, and when did they start selling for $4 a pop? Man, that's crazy. I remember when they were like $0.75 or a $1.00!

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  5. LOL!!! Aww I kinda wish we had him around here-- nostalgia and all (I remember paying 60 cents though)! Star Wars Wii would have been all I had to say to mine :-)

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  6. I can't believe the ice cream man is BACK ALREADY. EVIL SHIESTER!

    Good for you. But you know you can't avoid his evil music ALL summer. Good Luck!

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  7. LOL! Thank God there isn't an ice cream truck in Hillbilly Land.

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  8. Oh NO! He's not back is he? I can't deal with that villain. I WON'T! Ugh. Maybe there won't be an ice cream ogre in South Carolina . . .

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  9. Ugh...the ice cream man just gives me the willies. NEVER will my child have Ice Cream Truck Man ice cream (yes, I realize I just commited the faux paus of all parenting faux paus...but she will NEVER....EVER!)

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  10. Lol...ours will come by in the middle of the summer playing rudolph the red nose reindeer! It's so stupid lol!

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  11. bwhahahahaha!!! this is absolutely hilarious and awesome! ours has found it's way back around as well...and as fast as she drives through the hood it's a wonder if anyone can even slow her roll enough to get some over priced gummy eye'd sponge bob frozen goo on a stick!!

    first round of the warm months goes to the cline house!!! get it lady!

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  12. We had an ice cream man when we lived in Lincoln. We told Tristan it was the ding-dong man (although looking back, that sounds dirty...but you never know with those treat fellas).

    great job, mom!

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  13. I hear they now sell meth with their ice cream. Hahaha! Maybe its only around my hood.

    Honestly, i still run towards the ice cream man. What can i say, the music gets me every time.

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  14. we don't have an ice cream man. and after seeing that picture, i'm glad.

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  15. That is hysterical!! LMAO! I hate that dang ice cream truck. That's why I don't let my kids outside the house.

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  16. I am dreading the ice cream man!! He'll be coming in my area soon!

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  17. hahhaa im soo glad that my baby dont know who the ice cream man is YET!!!

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  18. hahahahaha now ME on the other hand would have been running TOWARD the ice cream man shoving children out of my way, hurdling some even JUST to get to my screw ball!! Sass = Sucka

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  19. LMAO. I love the ice cream man. LOL I'm happy it's supposed to be 72 here in the Bay Area. You have to love CA weather!!

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  20. Oh my gosh! I want to find the ice cream man! I love the little PInk Panther ice creams with the gumball eyes!

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  21. Ha ha, you're hilarious! Our ice cream man never actually went into hiberantion this year. He was out even when it was raining...& people actually bought stuff.

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  22. Alecia, you are hilarious! Loved this!

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  23. aww.. I love ice cream man. Mostly because he doesn't come through my neighborhood, but also because that sound instantly transports me to being a kid in Southern Cali in the 80's

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  24. The Ice cream man in my neighborhood is a Lebanese guy who drives a delapitated, 3 wheel, Frankenstein stylez motor-cycle/truck thing. The music is piercing and total awfulness. His prices are beyond highway robbery and his ice cream is probably from last August...nice and fresh. A total bandito!

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  25. LMAO! I don't think I ever got ice cream from the ice cream truck when I was a kid... and it only came down our street maybe once a week in July and August. You're a lucky mom you have the extended summer and daily visits! J/K

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  26. Screw the ice cream man, I'd hit up that cookie dough Dreyers any day!
    Totally makes me think of the Master P song, "Mr Icecream Man!!" I used to be so gangsta.

    "Before you jump in the game lets get one thing understood,

    If you sellin that icecream ya got to make sure its good"
    bahahahahahahaha!!

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  27. LOL, this post made me laugh! I so remember living in Cali as a small child and getting so excited for that ice cream truck and his treats and hearing the music from his truck. Too funny! Glad you won! LOL

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  28. Oh man this made me giggle, Damn the ice cream man he always comes back!

    SE x

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  29. I seem to remember my Mom telling us that there were needles hidden in the ice cream man's frosty confections. That was all she needed to do.

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  30. Good for you! You are a cheapskate after my own heart!! <3

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  31. Lucky for me, errr, my mom, I got so sick from the ice cream truck, that I ran away everytime he came to my hood. My kids just better get ready, though. I'm way to cheap for ice cream truck goodies!

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  32. Oh I am so glad that the boys do not yet know what that hoodlum is selling out of his creepy white kidnap me van! err I mean the ice cream man is.

    I'm gonna punch him if he ever comes around here! And I mean that in the nicest way possible!

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  33. What a cheeky cool creative blog. I like it, Stopping by from SITs. Have a wonderful Tuesday. xxxMsBabyPlan

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  34. Good for you! You are one tough mama to beat that guy. He plays rough. Hang tight!

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  35. We have the same guy... and what the h is he doing coming out in March!! (WTF) So I do the only thing that I could think of: OTTER POPS for everyone!!
    It work this time! and is way cheaper.... plus for some reason when I think of an ice cream man I think of nasty old men who LOVE kids... if you catch my drift!!

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  36. Dang nice weather that brings those money hungry jerks out with those scary vans!!! Love your posts! You have a way with words lady!!!

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  37. The only ice cream worth $4 a pop is the ones sold by Big Worm. Please tell me you saw Friday (you know Ice Cube, Chris Tucker?!). My kids never even eat the crap anyway because it's kinda nasty and they are always more absorbed in their scooter/bike/skateboard/peeing on a tree to concentrate on finishing it before it melts down their hand and stains their skin for the rest of the summer. Down with the Ice Cream Man!

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  38. ....and now he's probably penniless begging on the side of home exit ramp

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  39. I used to LOVE the ice cream man.

    He used to have this slush dessert that was only a buck.

    I imagine it's gone up in price though.

    *Sniffs*

    Thankfully we don't have an ice cream man on base. I'm glad because I figure my kids would always want something.

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  40. The ice cream man already! We don't have to worry about him for another three months.

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  41. I always wished I didnt live in a tiny town and could actually have an ice cream man!!

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  42. you are ONE SMART MOM!!! you have to be crafty and on your feet to outfox these folks! WELL DONE!!!

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  43. If the ice cream dude is back in your neck o' the woods, you must live in SOUTHERN Cali, where I heard it was 82 today and you had an earthquake! I think I should retire and work for Good Humor...the price is right!

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  44. Haha, this made me laugh. I totally forgot about the ice cream man until now, they still have those? Shit, I'm getting old!

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  45. Oh this reminds me of my childhood!

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  46. Geez, I haven't seen an Ice Cream Man in ages!!

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  47. I would never get into a fight with you.

    You fight with dairy. And that's frightening.

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