Friday, you're a hag!

TGI-FRIGGIN-F.

This week has been insane. Never ending 100% pure insanity. You name if, we've done it this week. Just to name a few...

* Soccer party? Check!

* Early birthday party for Mason (holy crap my baby is almost 6! wtf?!) Check!

* Jury duty? Check!

* Hanging out with Aunt Flo? Check!

* Dropped kicking my children like footballs because they were driving me NUTS??!! Check! Almost....so close....dang security cameras getting in the way!

Sweet mother of Abraham Lincoln does it ever end!?

And as if this week hasn't been hellish enough, my IBS has reared its ugly head and man, it has come back was a vengeance! I've come to find out that vengeance smells like spoiled lunch meat and makes your eyes water. Weird. But I'm getting off topic here...

My delicious piece of man-meat I refer to as my husband really brought his A-game this week. I mean this guy knows how to treat a lady....forget flowers and chocolates (wait...chocolates are ok, forget I said that)...screw diamonds and jewelery. I'm all about the finer things in life and Jordan knows it! Let me tell you he knew EXACTLY what I needed this week. Imagine my joy when he had his brother deliver this to our door....

Did the Heaven's just part?! What is this glorious manna I see before me?!
A MOUNTAIN of heaven's nectar....that's what it is....

{Oh sweet fountain of youth, how I love thee...}

Mmmmm

So come on Friday...show me what you've got. Because I'm saddled up and coming out guns a blazin'!! Thank goodness for liquid crack! Have an awesome weekend folks! I'll be here twitching in the corner if you need me...

Time for bribery!!

So I promised a giveaway and I'm here to deliver!! First of, a huge thank you to all of those who read the crap I put on this freak show I like to call my blog. It's amazing how many awesome people, and how many creepy people, I've met in the last few months....its like a giant session of group therapy...only free. Cha-ching! Anyhow, life here at the House of Cline has been crazy to say the least and I'm looking forward to things settling down so I can get back to my priorities in life....like blog stalking and googling pictures of Chuck Norris. But until then, how about a little bribe to keep you around???? Uh-huh...that's what I thought...here goes...

The kind people over at CSNbaby approached me about doing a giveaway and heck, free stuff for you guys??? Why not?! I was actually really impressed by their competitive pricing and their super wide range of products. They have over 200 stores, but their baby store is awesome! It has everything from baby gear and toys, to nursery furniture. So go on and check it out! And now to the good stuff, one lucky reader is going to be the proud new owner of this bad boy...

{The SLING not the baby!!}

SO CUTE!! Little Miss Presley was a colicky hag for the first 6 months of her life and I would have died without my sling. Plus this sling is super versatile and great even as your wee ones get older! So I'm way excited to pass one of these on! And you don't have to be a mom to enter folks... These make awesome baby shower gifts or even Christmas gifts! So here are the rules...go on over to the CSNbaby store and have a peek around. Then leave me a comment letting me know an item you like and how much you looooove me (but really how much do you love me? I bet it's a lot!). You've got until next Wednesday the 18th! Now GO!

Thanks again for being such masochists and subjecting yourselves to my nonsense. If I had to choose between you guys and The Hoff it'd be a tough call. That's how much I love you all. You're hofftastic. And I'm delirious...exhaustion is setting in. Did I mention I threw a birthday party today for a bunch of sugar fueled first graders??? Shoot me in the face. So go on, enter the giveaway, pay me money, maybe you'll win. I'm off to la la land to dream of Jordan in a loin cloth feeding me grapes and folding the laundry....meow...

Posh Spice has nothing on me!

Well I survived. After countless Saturdays spent screaming like a mad woman foaming at the mouth cheering on Mason from the sidelines, the season is coming to an end and we've made it in tact and without any fines or citations. I'm just as surprised as you are. I thought for sure I'd have at least one throw down with another mom....not that I didn't try, they're just apparently scared of this latina fury RAAWRRRR classier than I am. Whatever. Forget the Posh Spice's of the soccer world...I'll bring her down by her nappy hair, and look faaaabulous doing it!

But being that I was the Team Manager (yeah I don't know why they let me be that either) I was in charge of the 'End Of Season Party' and last night was THE night. I'd been stressing about it for a few days WEEKS! The end of season party is like a debutante's debut at the Cotillion, you only get one shot and you better make it good! (that's what she said) Unless your Jenny Humphrey...Gossip Girl, anyone??? Moving on. So needless to say I was a little nervous. My poor toilet, it gets abused when I get nervous...I can't help it. I have fidgety bowels. But it went off great and the kids had a blast!! We are so proud of Mason for being such an awesome team player...and for not getting in any brawls on the field! We're already excited for next year, that's for sure...For your viewing pleasure, I present the 2009 Lillehammers!

{Future David Beckham's of America Association}

{They were mesmerized by the slide show...}

{Chocolate cake...nom nom nom...}

{Our little terror...don't let the face fool you}

{I'd like to thank the academy....}

{My gift from the team :) It had a pedi certificate inside!! HOW CUTE!}

{This is what its all about.....}

{KIDDING!! This is what its all about! We're so proud of you baby!!}

We Love You Mason!! Way to Go!!

peeee essss- thank you to the Blog Blabbers (a fun new blog!!!) who featured me on their blog yesterday!! You guys rock!!

peeee essss essss- i have an awesome giveaway coming up for you guys tomorrow!!! just a little way to say thanks for all you awesome folks!

Where's the beef?

This weekend the posse met up for a totally tubular 80s party. It was straight up legit. We're talking Atari, Karate Kid, break dancing (cardboard floor and all...oh yeah..wicky wicky), and tons of wicked fashion. Sorry for the lack of pics, we were too busy tearing up the dance floor with our mega fresh moves...take a peek....

{Radical to the max....}


{My mega fresh b-boy getting crunk on the connect 4}


{You've sunk my battleship!}


{Look at these bodacious babes!}

{The ever-popular prom photo...}

{Some of my favorite valley girls...}

{These kids are bad to the bone...}

{My homefry and her mega cute tater tot...
take a look at the background..creeeepy!}

{Let's get physical!!}

{We're totally wicked yo....straight up cluuuuutch!!}

Seriously best. party. ever.....Plus I got to wear this all night....
and yes, my little Banana, they are bananas :)

Frickin Glorious.

Time to hang up the ol' skates....

It's a dark dark day in the Cline household...just shoot me now, I've lost the will to go on!! The hubs and I have come to the bleak realization that we would make a horrible figure skating duo. I KNOW!! I was just as shocked as you are! Dreams being shattered- check! Sigh....Well I guess there's always plan B, stay at home mom. It's just such a darn shame to waste such raw natural talent like ours....plus I really think we would look friggin fabulous sporting some rad threads like this:


But...it's just not in the cards for us. Fate can be a cruel hag. Someone should feed Fate a snickers bar and tell her to chill the heck out. Hag.

You're probably wondering how we came to this epiphany. Between you and me, I've always had a secret desire to be an ice skater. I think I watched The Cutting Edge one too many times as a child. Toe pick! Anyone?? Right then. So there we were spending some quality time together watching Modern Family.... FRIGGIN LOVE THIS SHOW...and a scene came on that showed two characters attempting to complete a skating lift and I KNEW we had to try. Right then and there. The moment of truth!!

With Jordan posted up on the opposite side of the room, I took a deep breath and gracefully ran toward him (picture a gazelle) and at the perfect moment...wait for it, WAIT FOR IT..... I leapt....SOARING through the air. And by soaring I mean about a good 3 inches off the ground or so....and landed right smack in the middle of his chest. Well crap.

It turns out that Jordan sucks at lifting. And I kinda suck at jumping...but in my defense jumping is A LOT harder than it looks folks! Have you tried it recently? It's tough, that whole 'getting off the ground' thing. Especially when your partner is over a foot taller than you!! But after several failed attempts and a few knees to the groin we accepted defeat.

It's been a hard day trying to process this newly discovered information. But we'll manage. Come to think of it, we're much too talented to be stifled in the ice rink. Plus I HATE being cold...maybe we should pursue other avenues....like pink pong.

Random crap that makes me happy....

Darn it all to heck! I'm in a funkity funk funk...So in attempts to make life easier and a little less stressful I've compiled a list of things that would break me out of this funky Debbie Downer wah wah wah mood and back into my normal crackhead self. Here's what I've come up with so far:

{How amazing would this be?! Make those pups earn their keep!}

{I could sing in the shower all day with this bad boy...}

{Pretty much the answer to all my problems. It's what I picture heaven to be.}

{I wonder if this baby mop comes in Presley's size???}

{The question is, how have I survived so long WITHOUT this?? Pure genius.}

{A moutachio guard...friggin amazing.}

{Not only would I be warm, but I wouldn't have to worry about that dang pig flu}

{And of course what's happiness without The Hoff?? And puppies!! Double whammy!}

SEE, I feel better already!! Happy Wednesday folks!!

Trick or treat fool!

Being the mother of the year that I am, I have TONS of amazing photos from our INCREDIBLE Halloween weekend for you to browse through...because I'm that awesome. Or not. In fact, my camera sucks monkey butt. Not only did it take crappy pictures, but some one forgot to charge the battery. Yeahhhh. So enjoy the random pictures we managed to salvage.

{Lock up your daughters, this one's gonna be a heart breaker}

{Mason huffing candy in the corner...holy sugar high batman}


{Jordan dressed up as my love slave....meow}

{Bathroom photo shoots with the girls....look at my little bug}

{My superheroes and little bug....man, we make good babies}

{Mason's throwing out the vibe...settle down ladies, he's only 5}


{The ladies of the night...aren't my besties hot?}

{Little Miss Rozzi celebrating her 1st Halloween...those leggings. I die!}

{Achilles's loves showing off his nuts.....HAHAA!}

{What's a holiday without a coordinating bow?!
Thanks to Miss Madison's Mommy for sending us this amazing headband!}

It was an AMAZING weekend overall...you're just gonna have to take my word for it. HAA! Hope you all had an amazing weekend!! And thanks to all those who participated in 'Did I ever tell you'....I've got some freaky friends!! BWAHAHA! And man, I'm so glad to know I'm not the only one who drank pickle juice.....nasties.