Free dog! Any takers?

I'm done. I've thrown in the towel. And earlier today I made the phone calls...that's right, plural. The phone calls that make all my worries disappear...now you're wondering who I called, aren't you? Let me tell you a little bit about my day first.

There I was, lovingly preparing Little Miss Presley a wholesome breakfast when she starts to whimper. So I rush over, whisk her up from her exersaucer, and plop her on my hip. That's when I feel "IT". No. No no no no no. Oh friggin monkey butt, it is. Yup, definitely poop. The little princess had gone and caused a crime scene on her clothes, the exercauser, herself, and ME. Somehow it had worked its way down her leg and she was doing a friggin river dance to make things worse! 45 minutes, 2 baths, 2 new outfits, and 1 destroyed exersaucer later we were back in business.

So I put her in her highchair and finally start feeding her the now cold breakfast and then it hits me. The dogs!! Where are the dogs? Ok, I see Bruiser, but where on earth is Sampson? Backyard? No. Boys room? No. KITCHEN? LIVING ROOM? OH CRAP!!!

Presley's room. Mmmhhhmm.

Yeah.

Devouring the left overs of the now empty diaper genie. Breathe, Alicia, breathe....

There he was, caught red-handed (or pawed, whatever) looking at me with a chunk of diaper hanging from his mouth. I'm pretty sure I looked like one of those cartoon characters with steam coming out of their ears because let me tell you, I was TICKED!! Fuuuming mad!!

So I clean up yet another disaster and go into the kitchen to wash off, happen to peek at the clock...and WHAT THE FREAK??? It's not even TEN in the flippin MORNING and my house smells like a dang public latrine!! That's when I knew it was going to be a very. very. long day. And that my friends, is when I picked up the phone and called Jordan. I explained to him very calmly that he has a vasectomy scheduled Monday morning because we are never having any more children and that I'm hanging up my bucket and mop and taking a few days off.

Following that call, I called Aleada. Aleada is a gift from above. Aleada is a true bearer of all things happy and lemony fresh scented. Aleada is my awesome housekeeper that I treat myself to now and again. Aleada is coming first thing Wednesday morning. Ahhhhh. Aleada is my favorite.