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I proceed to tell him that I think I have food allergies because my stomach CAN NOT handle food anymore. I eat, I get stomach cramps, I get mudbutt. Yeah, I'm getting personal, whatever, we're all friends, right? I tell him how badly I get gas...don't worry, I smell like roses on a spring day, and I tell him how my abdomen swells so badly I look friggin pregnant! Which is NOT the look I'm going for! But the worst part is the pain. I mean, lying on the floor in the fetal position, eyes watering, punched in the gut pain. So after a long visit, an hour of talking about "stool" (sick and wrong), and answering about 800 questions, you wanna know what this quack said?!?!
IBS....what, you didn't hear me? I said IBS....still can't hear me? IBS!! That stands for Irritable Bowel Syndrome...Sweet mother of Benjamin Franklin!!! That Doc has lost his mind! THEN...he proceeds to tell me that by looking at my food diary I'm also lactose intolerant and to stop eating dairy products. Um, ok, so after 25 years of existence my body just decides it doesn't like dairy?! Eh...I don't think he understands. Thursdays are Cookies and Cream frozen yogurt day at the Big Spoon. You want me to give that up?! No milkshakes, no ice cream, no yogurt, no cheese?!?!
I've lost my will to live...just shoot me in the face now and bury me with a hunk of Gouda tucked in my hands. What kind of life is a life with no cheese?! Sigh...
So Dr. X has ordered me to keep a food diary, which I've dubbed The Captain's Log (get it...log. poop. IBS.) I thought it was clever...so that way I can tell what foods my body is rejecting. And a new medication to take on top of that. BOO!
So I guess that Mexican food tonight isn't such a great idea, huh? I'm off to go throw a pity party for myself...and no, there won't be ice cream at my party....
Farewell, my sweet delicous friend...
Now your blog name really takes on a whole new meaning huh? LOL
ReplyDeleteI get this when I over eat. I LOVE food and yes, cheese too. I hope that if you try what I have been doing, and just eat what you love but less of it, then maybe you will be ok? maybe? I would hate to think of life without icecream and cheese!
ReplyDeleteI love your new blog...it fits your title. I'm sooo sorry to hear about your symptoms. I'd bring you flowers if i could. But would you settle for a {{HUG}}. Have a wonderful weekend ♥
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry you have to go through that. Maybe like the previous commenter mentioned you will still be able to have smaller amounts of the stuff you love if the meds help.
ReplyDeleteWORST NEWS EVER! No cheese? No ice cream? Blasphemy!
ReplyDeleteDid you explain to the doctor that he's going to have to choose something else? How about appendicitis? Or gout?
Go eat a butt load of pie.
Oh no, I'm so sorry!
ReplyDeleteYou poor thing! That's just horrible! :(
ReplyDeleteI hope that you can still enjoy bites here and there....I'll eat more cheese to enjoy your portion ;) someone else can eat ice cream for you, I don't have a sweet tooth.
It's kind of ironic, I'm actually drinking a McDonald's chocolate milkshake as I read this...not to rub it in. What about Lactaid or other products for people that are Lactose Intolerant? I think I probably am as well but I love cheese and ice cream too much to give it up. Anything + melted cheese = delicious.
ReplyDeleteIBS is COOL now.
ReplyDeleteDairy is so yesterday.
Jus' trying to help.
I am curious if dropping the milk helps. Let us know.
ReplyDeletethis has got to be the saddest thing that I have ever read. I am so sorry for you. There has got to be medication that you can take so you have eat ice cream, yes?
ReplyDeleteBIG, HUGE, GIGANTIC, MONSTEROUS sad face for you! Defintely takes the cake (so to speak... ha) over my incoherent crying over my love handles to my poor Husband.
ReplyDeleteWell, look on the sorta bright side.... Atleast you can still eat yummy Pink Delishisness. May you could take hubby into getting you your own box... you know to "celibrate" you now picky stomach! (wink)
ReplyDeleteCheer up Charlie! Lol I love that quote from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.
ReplyDeleteMy step mom has dietary needs because of what happens in the end ( i think you know what I mean). I hope it gets better for you :]
Cute new profile! I love the banner at the top, you are a cheese! hahahah
Have a great weekend
oxoxoxo
samantha
Oh man! You should change your name to "it is painful being cheesy!" Poor you, seriously, life without cheese? No thanks. Life without ICE CREAM??? I'm already dead thinkin' about it.
ReplyDeleteAlso, Captain's Log? HA HAHAHAHA!
And the word stool always makes me laugh. : )
Macey
I was just telling someone about this today...all humans are actually allergic to dairy. But they can condition their bodies to become use to it.
ReplyDeleteI know it's not exaclty the same, and a little more expensive, but there are really good soy ice creams out there! You might have to go through a few brands to find a good one, but I promise they exist.
Holy Canoli! Sorry hon.. that sucks ballz!
ReplyDeleteI may be a food whore...but I would deal with the crying in fetal position as long as I got my ice cream and cheese. I mean really, if I didnt have those... Id probably be on the floor crying anyway, so really, it would just be easier to not change anything... see my logic?
ReplyDeleteOMG! I so almost posted the N*Sync version of that song and decided to go with the original instead. Too funny!
ReplyDeleteHoly Cow! No Dairy? Does that mean you have to drink something like SOY????? Gag me. My food Pyramid consists of Dairy and Pasta so I basically WOULD die without it. I'm sad for you.
ReplyDeletedoesn't that quack know who you are?!?! has he not seen your button?!?! you have a blog DEDICATED to cheese, for crissake! feel better! i hope you can figure out a way to still eat ice cream and cheese.
ReplyDeleteholy fetch, muddbutt is a hilarious term! i am dying over here!! LOL all i can say is that no dairy totally sucks! i don't know if i could/would do it.....
ReplyDeleteOh when you described the pain, it made me tear up...you poor dear! So lactose intolerance means NO dairy at all? Well...maybe ice cream shops have special ice cream - you know like they do for diabetics. ??? I don't know.
ReplyDeleteI really hope this all gets figured out. :( No fun from the sounds of it. I'll be praying for you, especially the pain part.
I love you and your IBS. I wish I could make you feel better. On the plus side, your going to have a freaking six pack though!!! :) Love you!
ReplyDeleteI love the new look!
ReplyDeleteAww man that sucks..my friend has very bad IBS and endometrios (I have NO idea how to spell that one) and had to do the log...they told her the same really and we were gutted :( No more nights in eating cheese fest pizzas etc and ice cream to our hearts content :( xx
My heart goes out to you, I LOVE dairy! And food diary's scare me, do I really need to be reminded of EVERYTHING I eat? Sorry :( Oh stopping by from SITS
ReplyDeleteright there with ya, sister. IBS is exactly what you described. Stress tend to trigger mine. I can still eat dairy but I usually choose to eat it at home because if i get a reaction man not for a public restroom.
ReplyDeleteYou'll get use to it and as you get better try to slowly introduce one or two of you favorites back into your diet in small does it. It has gradually worked for me.
Oh, visitin from sits. gonna go add you to my blog roll
at least you can find humor in the situation... I'm not so sure I would be as positive if I was told no dairy! I hope you get to feeling better VERY soon SITSta :) have a good day!
ReplyDeleteI have the same stomach problems and each time they do 5 million test and then say oh there's nothing wrong..or oh you have IBS! it's so frustrating!! They do have some non-dairy ice cream that is good too. I hope they figure out what is wrong with you!
ReplyDeleteOh, I feel for you! Mamasita at our house is lactose intolerant & it's a tough thing. But there is a lot of pretty good substitutes out there. I'm not going to lie & say they are as good as the real thing, they aren't. But they are pretty good.
ReplyDeleteOMG you labeled your post Mud Butt. Too funny.
ReplyDeleteThat is AWFUL! Clearly that doctor has no idea what he's talking about, because nobody would ever recommend to cut cheese out of one's diet. Good god! All I can say is that it better help (with the "issues), or else.....
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness Alicia.....I don't know whether to laugh (because your writing always makes me laugh) or to cry (because you have IBS). You poor girl. That is one of my biggest fears now that I am growing old. Gee, give me a heart attack, toss me a stroke, but DON'T take away my dairy. =:-o
ReplyDeleteBefore you give up on ice cream all together, try lactose free ice cream, cheese and milk.
And try LaLoos' goat ice cream.
http://www.laloos.com/
It is real yummy and lactose free.
Have a beautiful weekend
Oh and may I just say....I love your new banner
ReplyDelete:-)
oh hun this is the worst! hopefully dr.x turn out to be wrong in his diagnosis...i have this exact same problem (symptom wise) and i have been on three different Rx and have changed diets multiple times and nothing ever works and they still don't know what's wrong...luckily it comes and goes (on for three months/goes away for four...etc) i was so glad when mine was not related to dairy!!! hoping the same for you!!!
ReplyDeleteOh poor thing! I would die without ice cream. And cheese. Cheese is definitely an essential.
ReplyDeleteSo I'm wondering will the blog name change to "It Ain't Easy Being NON-Cheesy"??! Sorry, I couldn't help myself.
I hope you discover it's actually peas that are causing your issue so you can continue to eat dairy. Cause who really needs peas anyway?!
My best friend from high school had similar symptoms for about 6 months before she did some research and recently figured out that she has Celiac disease (intolerance for gluten). Since she went gluten-free, she's like a new person.
ReplyDeleteNot saying you necessarily have the same thing, but you might try going gluten-free along with dairy-free to see if that helps. Web MD says that lactose intolerance and gluten intolerance go hand-in-hand. Good luck figuring out what ails you!
Oh no. I'd go crazy without cheese and ice cream. I'd be wandering around aimlessly going, "Cheese? Ice cream?" over and over again.
ReplyDeleteThat does suck. I hate anybody telling me I can't eat something cause then that's exactly what I want! Hopefully you can find a good way to manage your symptoms and try to be on speaking terms with lactose every now and then. I recently got diagnosed with IBS as well...can't say after 42 years of living with it I was extremely shocked :P
ReplyDeleteI can totally understand how that feels and the heart sunken moment you must have felt since i had a similar problem to you, it seems to be much better now, not always but most days
ReplyDeletex
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Seriously though.... are you going to eat healthy now? How is that supposed to work? Big Spoon will go out of business!
ReplyDeleteI have this same problem and it sucksssssss. I can barely handle cheese, straight milk makes me barf, and yogurt gives me hives. It's a mess. And yep, one day I was fine and then at 25 my body was all screw you and reeked havoc on my guts. Im so sorry you got stuck with this :(
ReplyDeleteI couldn't live like this. It's just not right and there's no.way.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry about that....
ReplyDeletecan't stand when our bodies do that to us.
xo
That just freakin' sucks!! I hope he's wrong and the food diary points to something icky like liver and onions.
ReplyDeleteThank the good lord that gummi bears are still on the menu!
ReplyDeleteGood lord, life without ice cream? that sucks! How about trying to "train" your body to take ice cream little by little? I did it, little by little.
ReplyDeleteoh no :( that makes me so sad.... maybe the doctors are wrong?! here's hoping...
ReplyDeleteWhere have I been???? THAT SUCKS woman! You can still have cupcakes tho, right?
ReplyDeleteHope the meds are making your tummy feel better. Miss ya! Loves, N